Monday, October 24, 2011

Ten Things New Moms Might Want To Know


Becoming a new mom is riddled with questions and self doubt.  Lots of questions are asked in our minds like “am I doing this right?” or “is my baby getting what he/she needs?”



I’m linking up with the fabulous Stasha at Northwest Mommy for her fantastic Monday Listicles again to talk about Ten Tips For New Moms.



As a mom to three boys I’ve been-there-done-that (although I’m no expert by any definition of the word...survivor maybe, but expert?  Absolutely not!) and feel I should share with all the new moms out there some things they might need to know.  FYI, I’m a tell-it-like-it-is kind of gal, you’ve been warned.  So here it goes:



1)      If you’ve never had a hemorrhoid before childbirth, plan on having one afterwards (or several).  It’s just the way it works.  Unless you are extremely lucky and if that’s the case, I don’t think we can be friends.



2)      If you decide to follow your Doctor’s orders and have 1 to 2 hot sits baths a day to help rid you of the hemorrhoids and help you heal your stitches faster (if you have them) DO NOT take these sits baths while being engorged.  Bad, bad, BAD combination.



3)      If you are engorged, I’m so sorry.  I know what it feels like and it’s horrible.  There is nothing worse than feeling like you have two personal-sized watermelons just hanging out on your chest.  The damn cabbage leaves never worked for me.  I had to go to the pain meds prescribed by my doctor.  Just know that if your Doctor knows you plan to breastfeed he will give you a pain med that is okay to take.  Don’t be afraid to ask.  And if you just can’t do it anymore, it’s okay to stop.  You are not hurting your baby by doing so!  Make the decision that is best for you and your child, nobody else.



4)      This is something that everyone EVERYWHERE says, but it is so true.  Sleep when your baby is sleeping.  Doesn’t matter if it is at 9am or noon or 9pm.  You need to sleep when your baby is sleeping because….



5)      You will be up A LOT!  Changing, feeding, or comforting your baby at all hours of the night and day. 



6)      Avoid the visitors.  Seriously, the last thing you really want in your house after giving birth and feeling like you look like crap is people coming over to see you and your new bundle of joy.  Give yourself time to just be.  Be with your baby, be with your family and be in this brand new role of yours.  That being said…



7)      DO accept help from others.  Accept meals that people offer to make and bring over for you.  DO accept the help people offer to do laundry or dishes.  It gets one more thing off your plate and you can do what you are suppose to do which is be the mommy.



8)      If you decide to be brave and entertain the idea of becoming intimate with your husband again, bring a bottle of wine and a sense of humor.  You will absolutely need both of them. 



9)      You can never hold a baby enough.  There is no such thing as spoiling a baby.  Hold him/her as much as you want, or as much as they want.  Besides you get to soak up that sweet intoxicating baby smell. 



10)   Take pictures…lots and lots of pictures and videos because its true what everyone says, they grow up in a blink of an eye and you are left wondering where the time went and realizing that the hemorrhoids, engorgement and tenderness, fatigue, feeling of being overwhelmed, wondering if you will every get your body back, was all so very much worth it.  And for what it's worth.  You ARE doing it right, and your baby IS getting everything he/she needs because he/she has you!




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54 comments:

Alison@Mama Wants This said...

All oh-so-true! Well, except I didn't get hemorrhoids (we can still be friends, right/). The visitor thing - yes, don't, just don't. Great tips, Hopes!

Kiddothings said...

Cabbage never worked for me too! And yes, sleeping when your baby sleeps is a life saver. Great list!

kita said...

The cabbage leaves did work for me thank goodness. These are great tips for new moms because sometimes know one tells you what to expect.

vinobaby said...

I think I have blacked out on most of these "delightful" memories of new motherhood. Love #8 -- so true!

Bridget said...

My aunt always says, "they're not spoiled, they're loved!" So true. Great list:)

Stasha said...

Tis is so true and honest, with a dash of funny. All the reasons we love visiting your blog.

Greta @gfunkified said...

First of all, how much do I LOVE that we both used the word "hemorrhoid" in our #1 tips for new moms?? SO MUCH. Only mom bloggers, right? :)

These are all so, so true. Love this list.

Bestfoodies said...

Ah yes do sleep when you can and eat when they are asleep probably the only time your food will be hot! I agree except help...as a matter of fact ASK for it! Enjoyed your list.

Jennifer said...

As my pediatrician told me, you can't spoil a baby by loving her/him. I loved that.

Jackie said...

Great list!
Didn't get the hemmoroids, but a fair share of stretch marks...ugh! We joke that my milk supply could have provided enough for a small African village.

jacqui said...

These are all excellent tips for new moms. I guess it's because you're somewhat of an expert by now, huh?

Jen said...

Those last two are SO absolutely true!!! What a great list you've made :)

Mommy2¢ said...

LOL! You crack me up. No roids for me. I had two c-sections... can we still be friends??

Annie said...

these are wonderful tips and so true. Engorgement is so painful :(

My tips are "there are catty moms that will make you feel like a bad mom if you don't parent THEIR way. Ignore them. Follow your heart, you are a good mom."

MamaMash said...

I am ever so thankful to have avoided the H word and the E word. Those two would have combined to make my kid an only child for sure. :)

Great list!

Rach (DonutsMama) said...

#9 and #10 are so true! And yes, do accept help from people. You never realize how much you'll need!

Jamie said...

Oh the smell...it comes and goes so quickly. Sigh

Cookie's Mom said...

"...bring a bottle of wine and a sense of humor. You will absolutely need both of them." - So true! That actually applies to many things.

The engorgement was almost too much to take.

Awesome list!

Poppy said...

My hemorrhoids were so ferocious they had their own wine glasses.

Grumpy Grateful Mom said...

Oh, this post was great for me to read. You are curing me of my baby fever. I was sore for a while after the last baby. I am not so lucky. I'm glad we can still be friends. :)

Lisa said...

I can't tell you how unromantic I felt for a long time after the birth of my first. Wine and a sense of humour is a godsend.

Kimberly said...

Love the list, but those last 2 are so true!!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Alison,

OH Man...I'm so very jealous of those mommy's that don't get hemorrhoids. But I love ya so yes of course we can still be friends. Visitors right after birth is the worst!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Kiddothings,

Yeah The cabbage leaves were a joke...for me at least! Meds were the only thing that worked.

Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

kita,

Oh I'm so glad they wored for someone! I'm so glad you liked this list. Thank you for stopping by. Hope to see you again!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

vinobaby,

I think that that is Mother Natures way of tricking us into having more children. HA!

I think I needed two bottles for #8

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Bridget,

I love your aunts saying!!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Stasha,

Thank you so very much!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Greta,

HA! Guess great minds think alike huh?? If not for mom bloggers telling it like it is, who will?

Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting, I truly appreciate it!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Bestfoodies,

OHH eating while they are sleeping is another great tip. I should have done that more!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Jennifer,

You've got a great pediatrician! You really can't spoil a baby with attention.

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Jackie,

I'm so glad you enjoyed it. The milk supply thing is crazy in the beginning isn't it? HOLY COW!! Literally.

Thank you so much for stopping by. Hope to see you again soon!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

jacqui,

Not an expert by any means. More like a survivor! HA!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Jen,

I'm so glad you liked the list. Thank you!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Mommy2cents,

Hmmm, well lets see. I made you laugh so I guess I can over look it and we can definitely still be friends!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Annie,

Oh Engorgement was so amazingly painful. I never want to go through that again!!

You have a great tip. Thank you so much for sharing!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

MamaMash,

Oh man! I'm so very jealous and am currently re-thinking our friendship! ;) Not really of course.

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Rach,

I'm glad you liked it!!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Jamie,

It does go so quickly! I wish it didn't.

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Cookie's Mom,

#8 can apply to so many different things which is why it might just be my favorite!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Poppy,

And that is why I consider you a friend! Misery loves company right?

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Grumpy Grateful Mom,

OH! But I would love to see another one of your little ones running around! But I know what you mean. The reality of it all can totally scare you off of doing it all over again! YES! We are of course still friends!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Lisa,

I'm so glad you could relate. Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Kimberly,

Not matter what it's all worth it isn't it?

Missy said...

I love these tips! Especially sleep when the baby's sleeping . . .

Krista @ Not Mommy of the Year said...

I wish someone had given me these tips 2+ years ago. Especially the avoid visitors one. Because its hard to sleep when the baby sleeps when you have company sitting on your couch.

Elaine A. said...

8,9, 10 - YES to all of these! Love your list and glad I'm on the other side where I can relate instead of wondering what you mean by all of this. ;-)

Kate F. (@katefineske) said...

We definitely were separated at birth :) Every single one of these would be on my list (especially the hemorrhoids one! - this is NOT a laughing matter - well... maybe it is... BUT STILL!)

Great list!

Erika Marie said...

Everything about this was so true. I just want to know where the people were that were supposed to come help me!! I got nothing! Bastards.

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Missy,

I wish I had slept more when the babies were sleeping. I tended to try to get things done instead. Big mistake!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Krista,

The visitor one is key. You are so right, you can't sleep when people are sitting on your couch and you feel like you have to play hostess. Sucks!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Elaine,

I'm so glad you can relate!! Perspective is so much clearer on the other side isn't it?

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Kate,

I'm telling you, our connection runs deep! :)

Hemorrhoids is not a laughing matter. Those suckers are brutal!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

Erika Marie,

Thank you so very much for stopping by and commenting. I truely appreciate it!

I'm so very glad you could relate and I'm sorry nobody came to offer help! Bastards indeed!